just a feeling

Like this, we ended things ever so swiftly. As you closed the door without a glance, my heart broke a little more. I’m lying in the dark and there’s no sunshine left here. 

sh3bangg:

Some people just don’t know when it’s enough. They see you crying out for help and hopelessly dying but they continue to keep stabbing at you. They only see their happiness and only consider the things they thought you did wrong. Never will they understand what they put you through..

The end it seems.

dear god,

If you let me get this job at Health Partners, I promise I will be forever grateful. 

killing two birds with one stone

Pretty content atm. I need more of this and less of the fighting. Opened a new account at US Bank. Also, talked about my hours at work and received a $50.00 gift card to Victoria Secrets from Kimberly, and Dr. Yang as a birthday present. I honestly think I am pretty lucky to be working here at the clinic regardless of the complications. Also, people say working with Hmong employers are a pain in the ass but I disagree with that. =) 

How old is your soul?

I know that in time everything will get better. That time heals old scars and hearts will mend. Through time I will forgive and forget. But right now, I’m having a hard time containing my emotions. So much that I feel like a wreck. I feel beaten and abused. Forgotten and taken for granted. So why is it that my foolish heart is still beating for you?

I lie when I’m not okay because I was taught that being strong means to not falter at the littlest heartache. Everything is a joke and I’m falling faster then the raindrops outside. When I’m sad or depressed, the only thing that makes me feel better is shopping. But I’m broke from paying off a Florida trip I wont be going on anymore. What hurts the most is knowing that you put your friends before me. I don’t complain when you’re out every weekend getting drunk with them at the bars or clubs. All I asked was a weekend in with just the two of us, and your friends can’t even give us some space? Calling you in the middle of the night telling you to go out, saying how much you’re missing out. It gets me so mad that they don’t even respect our relationship. Of course they wouldn’t understand because they’re single, but really? So I’m at fault for getting upset. I’m crazy. All I want is your time but apparently I’m losing it to some guys you call your friends.